Sry I called you an 8
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
