I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
