I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
