LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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