ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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