So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Randomize