I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
