i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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