It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
