this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize