I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
