But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize