Betty ford says i'm here all night
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
