My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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