i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Randomize