guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
