Moan for me like Helen Keller
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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