I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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