Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
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