i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
