Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize
