we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize