so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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