so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
