Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
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