we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I think i got beer on your cat.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
