dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Randomize
