do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
