that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Randomize
