Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I think I just shit out all my problems.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize