He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
