I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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