mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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