at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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