I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
