i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
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