non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize