My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
He shit in the fireplace
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