dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
