Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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