Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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