mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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