Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize