Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
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