my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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