How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize
