Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
