You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
