it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Randomize
