I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
i just had sex bonerless
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
